On DMPCs

Hello!  It's been a while, hasn't it?  Well, there's been a couple reasons for that...one of which is the fact that I recently got married (yay!) but the lead up to it, particularly during the month of February and the first part of March, was particularly grueling, and didn't leave me much free time.  The other reason is the fact that after I got back from the honeymoon, I got lazy.  Like, really lazy.  Didn't want to do much of anything after work, never bothered to unpack, that sort of thing.  So I'm getting back in the saddle, and I thank you for everyone who cheered me on and pushed me to make more blog entries.
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Today's entry is on DMPCs.  Here's the short version: just don't fucking do it.  Ever.

Okay, now that I have that out of my system, let's go through the long version, and talk about DMPCs: what they are, why people want to use them, and why they shouldn't ever do this.

No, seriously.  I'm not going to espouse the merits of DMPCs, because as we'll see, there aren't really any solid, good reasons to use them.  And yes, this is coming from the perspective of someone who has both had them in groups he's been in as well as forced them upon the party as a DM.  It's time for me to atone for my sins.

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What's A DMPC?
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The DMPC is the DM's character.  This is different from an NPC, which is someone the DM controls in order to interact with the party in some way, be it through a conversation on the street, a transaction with a vendor, or some kind of plot device.  The DMPC is someone that joins the group and tries to be a real addition to the party, injecting personality whenever necessary, and guides the group to their plot prescribed destinations.  DMPCs are generally an unwelcome annoyance to the group, for a number of reasons, such as:

• May claim a share of the treasure\experience
• May be considerably more\less powerful than the party
• Takes up valuable time during combat encounters

I'm going to break down each of these.
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May claim a share of the treasure\experience
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Okay, this doesn't usually happen, but it's not impossible.  And this is actually something that's OK when henchmen are concerned.  Henchmen aren't DMPCs, they're NPCs.  They are hired help, and typically are ordered about by the PCs to an extent (they won't jump off a cliff, but they'll fight some orcs), so it only makes sense that they ask for their fair share.  Henchmen are also entirely optional; no DM would force henchmen onto the players, players have to seek them out and hire them.

In the case that it's some plot device NPC who jumps in, tags along, and then says "I want my fair share"?  Fuck that guy.
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May be considerably more\less powerful than the party
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This is kind of a hallmark of the DMPC.  The DM wants the party to take this story essential dude with them, and to preserve the plot, makes him a 17th level ranger so he doesn't get one shotted by the enemy (or worse yet, the players).  Where does this leave the players?  Well, if they aren't level 17, it leaves them on the sidelines, watching the DM's "omg so awsum" character wreck the enemy.  The DM isn't a player, and even if he was, he should put the GameGenie away.
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Takes up valuable time during combat encounters
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Let's face it.  Being a DM is hard fucking work.  You have to plan the encounters, the monsters, the plot, the setting...every week, or however often you meet, the DM plans all this stuff.  New monsters, new challenges! This also means new stat blocks.  A round of combat can be pretty long even if the players have all their shit together and know what they're gonna do, because while the player controls one guy, the DM can control dozens.  Does the DM really need one more character to control?  If you've ever had a game where a single round of combat took an hour to get through, you have a pretty good idea of where I'm coming from here.
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Why even do this?
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So we've looked at a number of reasons why DMPCs are a pretty bad idea.  Why does it even happen?  Well, there are a couple of reasons, and they mainly lie on the DMs side of the table.  Sometimes, the DM feels like they need the DMPC there to keep the plot going in the direction they want.  In this case, please direct them to my blog post of what to do when your BBEG dies; specifically the parts where "the players are the heroes" and "quit fucking with their story".

But sometimes the DM just loves the story and world they've created so much, that they want to try and experience it from the players' perspective and have it both ways.  You can't really be mad at someone who has invested themselves in the setting so fully, but at the same time you have to lay down the ground rules and tell your DM that having the DMPC around isn't actually helping.  The players aren't progressing as quickly as they'd like because the combat encounters take too long, or the players don't want to babysit an NPC.  It's harsh criticism to take, but ultimately it'll result in a net positive for your game.